In order for me to go ahead with this step it is important that you have mastered the Step- 1. So let us move on.
Now since you have started having a conversation with the particular girl, it is time to earn her friendship. She might be a bit skeptical at first but with your straight forward attitude she will have her defenses down a bit. You need to utilize it. So the first question that might come to your mind is what to talk about? Well, how the hell should I know? I am not a mind reader. You need to find out yourselves. But I can guide you over the basic aspects that need to be there in the conversation to keep it going and also develop a more in depth relationship with her. Though at first you might not get much chance to talk to her properly, these guidelines will be helpful whenever you do develop the chance.
The basic points you have to keep in mind are:
I guess you have heard this many times before but it still remains the same; you need to listen to her. Listening means paying attention to her and also as to what she is talking. No matter what the subject is, you need to listen. If possible contribute something to the conversation, it helps. But remember if it is a topic which she knows a lot about and you on the other hand are as dumb as a twig about it, it is better to act as someone who doesn’t know about it but at the same time is interested in understanding it. If you listen properly you can ask some genuine doubts. This interest of yours will have an effect on her which will work in your favour.
Though it is good to let the girl do the most of the talking if you remain silent throughout then she might feel that you are not interested in talking or sometimes in other words, you are boring. So you need to talk. You don’t have to be a chatter box but whatever you say should be relevant to the topic you both are talking. As I suggested earlier, genuine doubts are good. It is also important that on certain days you lead the talk. I am sure there will be topics of which you know a lot about and which is of interest to her too. You just need to find it. The initial days are for that. Also keep in mind avoid abusive language and swearing as Indian girls resent it, at least in the early days. It is important that you treat her with respect.
3. The Voice and Sound modulation:
Your voice should beam confidence and should make her feel her that you are happy to talk to her. Always talk clear with proper voice modulations and style. Each of us has a style. You just need to develop it. It is good that you have some bass to your sound as most girls find it appealing and sexy.
If there is something you don’t agree with don’t go all out against her with the disagreement. Just tell her what you disagree with. You need to back your views with valid reasons and justifications. At no point should you raise your voice to make the point. Though it is not a debate, in case of disagreements it is always better to treat it in a scholastic way.
5. Talking over the phone:
If possible get her mobile number. Though there are many ways to make her give the number, I choose to ask. It is just that you need to know when it is fine to ask her without invoking her fears. Also when you get her number make sure she has yours too. So it is important that you don’t actually call her right after you get the number. Text her some forward about friendship for a few days. But again try to be as new as possible. Don’t send her the same message which you have received countless times before. Invest sometime to find some new messages in the internet. Then you may give her a call sometime. Keep the call short and during normal hours. I will write another posts about talking over the phone as I guess in today’s world most of the relations develop over the phone. So it is something to be given thought to.
6. Sharing talents and hobbies:
There is no body without any talent. I am sure you might have some thing that will fascinate her. Maybe you are good at drawing or singing or dancing or something else. If nothing then maybe you are good with relationship advices. No matter what, you are good at something than others. Identify it and use it. Ask her about her hobbies, if she says reading and you happen to share the same hobby then ask her what sort of books, her favourite author etc. Talk about various authors without making her feel, that you are a nerd. If that is not one of your hobbies tell her how much you appreciate someone who has good reading habits. Make her feel that you too want to have a good reading habit or something of that sort. This will help in developing your budding friendship and it will also help you identifying traits, characters, interests of her which will be very much needed in the future.
7. Sense of humour:
You need to have a good sense of humour. By sense of humour I mean where you humorous without harming others feelings and also being able to accept the times when you are being made fun of without any resentment. You don’t always have to crack jokes and act funny but based on the circumstances you should be at times. I can write pages and pages but can never fully explain how to have a good sense of humour.
8. Compliment her:
Last but not the least, you need to compliment her. But here again, I didn’t mean flattery. It means a genuine compliment. Also I didn’t mean her physical self. Try to really see what the good characters in her are. Get examples of those. When you really feel that she deserves it, lavish it upon her. But never ever over do it. Tell her something which herself might know. But it is always good to hear from someone else.
Already the post has become too long. But it’s just that I have so much to say over all these things, maybe I will write more posts elaborating each step some time. But guess for the time being this will do.
So bye for now and happy dating…